Sana-chan

let's make this a little bit worse. someone i have known since i was like.. 11 attempted suicide. i dont know when. but he let go of the wheel of his truck, and flipped it in a ditch. he's alive but he said he wasn't ashamed of doing so. how much more of this can one take? im breaking and i dont know what to do. i cant get ahold of him either... what is left for me to do?

i think so at least.. i think some of the last posts i made were when i was fighting with zach and that was when i was a sophmore in high school so myabe not 5? maybe 3-4? cuz i remember i signed up after my sister (rgurl!!!) that was in..hm.. didnt you redo the site? and we all had to sign up again? that iwas in 2002 im sure of. its 2007 now =D thanks guys

hehe. ive been good akane =D i miss you pasketi ;.; i missed you too!!!!! and godgrave.. i think i believe you on that lol =D thanks for the welcome back =D

I agree with the fear. They have changed it a little. Which saddens me. The book was so freaking awesome. I think the only thing they changed is age and something else I can't remember. I'm excited for the movie, but I'm hoping they don't mess with it too much.

Big Blue Dress - Cranius

hehe, thanks everyone. didn't see it comin did you? here's the funny thing, i didn't either. i had a dream last night and like.. it included all the original ac goers so i joined back up =D

I play WoW. It's fun. Started out as alliance, but then got bored with that cuz the server i was on had kids.. stupid kids -.- So i switched to horde I have a 70 undead mage on Black Dragonflight =D update on my mage, she's now on Muradin. yeah.. Her name is Zyrah and she kicks rear. Sorta.. in the none epic gear kinda way

I'm so upset about this I don't even know where to start. Sophmore year through senior year sucked. After a certain breaking point in my life I was diagnosed Bi-Polar 1 disorder. I caved and let my mother take me to a doctor to get checked out and get some meds. The meds they gave me (abilify) had a TERRIBLE side effect. only in adolescent FEMALES would there be a huge weight gain i went from 125 pounds to 185 within a couple of months. I have still am having a hard time dropping this weight. I've switched from medication to medication. Graduation.. I broke out in hives from my meds three days before. This isn't a normal graduation either... White wedding dresses are worn. it's stupid really.. anyway, i stopped taking my meds during may of 2006 and I started going to sac state. Things were going better than usual. I could stick around at school if I didnt wanna go home. First thing went wrong.. My boyfriend from frosh year in high school was killed in a motorcycle accident. A few days later, one of my close friends attempted suicide. She's fine now and regrets ever attempting.. but.. it really affected me. I had to drop a few classes. At that point, nothing mattered to me anymore. So I talked my parents into letting me withdraw from my classes. So, I got the rest of the semester off and I was told either I work or I go back to school Got a job at a local raley's they treated me like crap. wont go into that. quit after two weeks. (xmas season lol) I signed up for classes at a community college. I kid you not I broke down 2 am the day i was supposed to go. Talked my parents outta making me go. For two months I was looking for a job. I lost track of how many applications I turned in. I then told my parents I wanted to move to santa cruz. that didnt go to well. My parents told me I needed to work at least two months before I could move. Well.. I wasted two months looking for a job. Never got a call back from anyone. So, February 13, I had my stuff packed up and I had a little money and i left a note on my kitchen counter saying where i went. here I am, in santa cruz. living in an apartment with my boyfriend and two other people. havent had to pay rent yet. wont have to pay until next month because i just recently got a job. My parents are dealing with this. I know it was a stupid thing to do. But, is it so wrong that I am much happier here? is it so wrong that i can actually be myself? not having to hide anything. i havent been this happy in a while, but why must i still feel guilty? if im so happy, why should i feel bad. i hate my parents.. they put me through hell and never appreciated me for me. i always had to explain every single thing to them. I had gotten my lip pierced. i liked it a lot. but my mom convinced me to switch it from a loop to a stud. a month too soon. it started closing up cuz i didnt have the right kind of stud. and i had to take it out. i miss it terribly, but i cant get another lip piercing because of my job... i do miss home. i miss my puppy and i cant believe im saying this, but i miss my parents. how can someone who hates the nagging and the fact i never got a say in things that happened to me miss it..?

I'm not new here. But.. I couldn't remember my password from my other account and I don't have that e-mail address anymore.. So, whoever said it, was right. Once you've been here you can't stay away. Allie is my name and I think it's been five years? The reason I left, wasn't because I wanted to. It was because I was in a bad relationship and let the guy control me..eh.. It's over now. oh and, I moved lol. Lots has happened! I've missed you all!