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Ladywriter

Things that you understand if you live in upstate New York

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1. Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway

2. "Vacation" means going to Syracuse for the weekend

3. You measure distance in hours

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day

6. You stay in your house most of the summer because you aren't used to the heat

7. You drive at 55 mph through 10 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching

8. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events

9. You install security lights on your house and garage but leave both unlocked

10. One of your neighbors constantly has bonfires

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the supermarket at any given time

13. Your idea of a huge party is one with lots of cheap beer and some people you go to school with

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow

15. You think sexy lingerie is silk pajamas from wal-mart

16. You know 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, cold, construction

17. It takes you 2 hours to go to the store for one item even when you're in a rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town

18. At least 6 people that you see a day have beards and stains on the front of their shirt

19. Cows are just part of the scenery

20. You or someone you know has a car that sounds like a big truck and can barely make it 20 miles yet no one says anything about it.

21. At least fives times in your normal travel day you will pass or be passed by a beat-up, old ass car that has had an attempted pimping out, such as a brand new oversized spoiler on a rust covered trunk, spinning HUBCABS, or everyones favorite, the performance exhaust on a car running on barely three cylinders.

22. You know that the phrase, "Goin up ta," applies to going north, south, east, or west, up or down in elevation, and pretty much any other way you can travel.

23. The smell of freshly spread cow manure doesn't bother you.

24. Its perfectly normal for your life's aspirations to be working for the county.

25. Getting "dressed up" means tucking your shirt into your jeans and putting on clean work boots.

26. Holloween costumes are always designed around a snowsuit and winter boots.

27. You appreciate the delicacy known as Croghan Bologna, and serve it at all social gatherings.

28. On the same platter as the Croghan Bologna is a selection of flavored cheese curd, which you also love.

29. You know damn well that the verizon guy didn't walk through your town going, "can you her me now" because reception is, at best, limited.

30. Your proud of your redneck-ness and where your from.

31. You can name everyone you graduated with.

32. You know what 4-H is.

33. You ever went to a party that was held about 20 miles down a deserted dirt road.

34. You used to drag "main."

35. You said the 'F' word and your parents knew within an hour.

36. You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers since you know which ones would bust you.

37. You ever went or thought about going cow-tipping.

38. School gets canceled for a sports team going toState

39. You could never buy cigarettes cause all the store clerks knew how old you were.

40. When you did find someone old enough to buy smokes for you, you had to drive down country backroads to smoke them.

41. You never missed a Homecoming parade.

42. You still go home for Homecoming.

43. It was cool to date someone from a neighboring town.

44. You had a senior skip day.

45. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.

46. You can't help but date a friend's ex.

47. Your car is always filthy from the dirt roads.

48. You think that kids who ride skateboards are weird.

49. The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snotty" when it is just like your town.

50. Getting paid minimum wage is considered a raise.

51. You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1980 as the "rich people."

52. The people in the big city dress funny then you pick up on the cool new trend two years later.

53. You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.

54. On Fridays, anyone you want to find can be found at Main Street or the Dairy Queen.

55. Weekend excitement involves a trip to RiteAid.

56. Even the ugly people enter beauty contests.

57. You decide to walk for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask you if you need a ride.

58. Your teachers call you by your older sibling's name.

59. The closest "cool stores" are at least 45 miles away.

60. The local phone book has only one yellow page.

61. You leave your jacket on the back of the chair in the

cafe, and when you go back the next day, it's still there, on the same chair.

62. You don't signal turns because everyone knows where you're going, anyway.

63. You call a wrong number and they supply you with the correct one.

64. You have to name six surrounding towns to explain to

people where you're from.

65. Driving to the party on a four wheeler is quite normal.

66. The town population increases by one-third when the universities go on break.

67. When somebody says "Thats billy fucillo HUGE" you know exactly what they are talking about

68. You laugh your head off reading this because you know it's true and then forward it to everyone in your address book, which is actually half your town


                                               gallery_3_22_21209.jpg

                                               Look at the flowers

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:huh: How far up state are we talking?...

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is 10 cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway

I'm sure I've seen that before.

2. "Vacation" means going to Syracuse for the weekend

Too poor... Either went to KOA or Gilbert Lake...

3. You measure distance in hours

True.

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once

I've probably known people who have known people...

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day

Sounds like something I'd try to do in the winter if I had AC...

6. You stay in your house most of the summer because you aren't used to the heat

At one point probably true...

7. You drive at 55 mph through 10 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching

No car... no good comment...

8. You see people wearing hunting clothes at social events

Not social enough to know...

9. You install security lights on your house and garage but leave both unlocked

I'll remember this if I can ever afford a house & garage...

10. One of your neighbors constantly has bonfires

True & 2 although technically most were them burning garbage...

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them

I'd like to know how she uses them...

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at the supermarket at any given time

Dang... I've usually known it to be the one... but 7... thats crazy...

13. Your idea of a huge party is one with lots of cheap beer and some people you go to school with

8.

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled in with snow

7.

15. You think sexy lingerie is silk pajamas from wal-mart

...

16. You know 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, cold, construction

True.

17. It takes you 2 hours to go to the store for one item even when you're in a rush because you have to stop and talk to everyone in town

This usually happens when I'm taking the bus...

18. At least 6 people that you see a day have beards and stains on the front of their shirt

6?... I thought it was normal to see people like that...

19. Cows are just part of the scenery

True... Although I haven't seen cows on a daily basis in 4 or more years.

20. You or someone you know has a car that sounds like a big truck and can barely make it 20 miles yet no one says anything about it.

I'm sure my mom's ex had nothing but cars like that.

21. At least fives times in your normal travel day you will pass or be passed by a beat-up, old ass car that has had an attempted pimping out, such as a brand new over sized spoiler on a rust covered trunk, spinning HUBCABS, or everyones favorite, the performance exhaust on a car running on barely three cylinders.

Maybe once in my life when I was still in High School... Haven't seen anything like that since.

22. You know that the phrase, "Goin up ta," applies to going north, south, east, or west, up or down in elevation, and pretty much any other way you can travel.

Wait... it's not supposed to?...

23. The smell of freshly spread cow manure doesn't bother you.

Cow manure > Cigarrettes...

24. Its perfectly normal for your life's aspirations to be working for the county.

I think I grew out of that...

25. Getting "dressed up" means tucking your shirt into your jeans and putting on clean work boots.

Maybe at one point this could have applied to me... maybe.

26. Halloween costumes are always designed around a snowsuit and winter boots.

Last time I really did anything Halloween related I was 12... I dressed up as a bank robber... Seemed like the cheap & practical thing to do with out ending up with some crappy costume for my last year of trick or treating.

27. You appreciate the delicacy known as Croghan Bologna, and serve it at all social gatherings.

My mom might have...

28. On the same platter as the Croghan Bologna is a selection of flavored cheese curd, which you also love.

Not sure on that one...

29. You know damn well that the verizon guy didn't walk through your town going, "can you her me now" because reception is, at best, limited.

I generally hate Phones... So I wouldn't know.... Although I had at one point lived next to a cell phone tower & went on the same bus as someone who lived near a different cell phone tower.

30. Your proud of your redneck-ness and where your from.

No... I'm generally confused... I was born in Queens, New York, New York & was only there for about 3 years... I just hope my mom didn't think I needed a stereotypical white childhood...

31. You can name everyone you graduated with.

I think I'd try to forget everyone I had a GED class with...

32. You know what 4-H is.

Sadly to say... nope...

33. You ever went to a party that was held about 20 miles down a deserted dirt road.

I think my mom might of dragged me to some as a kid when she was more social.

34. You used to drag "main."

Nope... but sounds kind of interesting...

35. You said the 'F' word and your parents knew within an hour.

I don't remember...

36. You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers since you know which ones would bust you.

8.

37. You ever went or thought about going cow-tipping.

I wish... Me & my friends got in to trouble for egging... Dumbest idea ever... It wasn't even Halloween & since we were the only teenage guys in (or near) the trailer park the cops didn't have a hard time guessing who... Although my cracking to anger that my friends might have blamed it all on my might have had some roll in it...

38. School gets canceled for a sports team going to State

Don't know.... Never paid attention to school sports.

39. You could never buy cigarettes cause all the store clerks knew how old you were.

40...

40. When you did find someone old enough to buy smokes for you, you had to drive down country back roads to smoke them.

Could have gotten into trouble for buying for a friend that couldn't buy them yet... (un)luckily me & my friend got into trouble for "trespassing through someone's driveway"...

41. You never missed a Homecoming parade.

I probably missed lots, if not all...

42. You still go home for Homecoming.

No...

43. It was cool to date someone from a neighboring town.

...

44. You had a senior skip day.

... Never heard of it...

45. The whole school went to the same party after graduation.

Not me...

46. You can't help but date a friend's ex.

Nope... I'm sure I was the last of last resorts that no girl had to resort to... meh...

47. Your car is always filthy from the dirt roads.

7.

48. You think that kids who ride skateboards are weird.

I think a lot of people are weird...

49. The town next to you is considered "trashy" or "snotty" when it is just like your town.

A lot of people have had that view of Walton...

50. Getting paid minimum wage is considered a raise.

With the way some people have talked in the past I'd believe it...

51. You refer to anyone with a house newer than 1980 as the "rich people."

I probably would...

52. The people in the big city dress funny then you pick up on the cool new trend two years later.

I don't think so... I don't pay attention to what people in NY, NY are doing.

53. You bragged to your friends because you got pipes on your truck for your birthday.

7.

54. On Fridays, anyone you want to find can be found at Main Street or the Dairy Queen.

Don't know I couldn't get there.

55. Weekend excitement involves a trip to RiteAid.

Does Friday count?... I go their on Fridays... & some times Wednesdays... & maybe even the last day of the month...

56. Even the ugly people enter beauty contests.

I don't pay attention to idiot contests... So I wouldn't know.

57. You decide to walk for exercise and 5 people pull over and ask you if you need a ride.

Once or twice.

58. Your teachers call you by your older sibling's name.

Never had that problem since I'm the oldest... Hope my sister didn't either...

59. The closest "cool stores" are at least 45 miles away.

I could think of some maybe if I really thought about it...

60. The local phone book has only one yellow page.

Never seen a local phone book... everything is tied together by the counties.

61. You leave your jacket on the back of the chair in the

cafe, and when you go back the next day, it's still there, on the same chair.

Never had that happen does sound amazing though...

62. You don't signal turns because everyone knows where you're going, anyway.

7.

63. You call a wrong number and they supply you with the correct one.

Never happened...

64. You have to name six surrounding towns to explain to

people where you're from.

Just one surrounding town... Cooperstown.

65. Driving to the party on a four wheeler is quite normal.

To poor to know...

66. The town population increases by one-third when the universities go on break.

That wouldn't surprise me.

67. When somebody says "Thats billy fucillo HUGE" you know exactly what they are talking about

Sadly to say... No...

68. You laugh your head off reading this because you know it's true and then forward it to everyone in your address book, which is actually half your town

Only in someone else's dreams...


Those who fight deplorables should see to it that they themselves do not become deplorables.

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2. "Vacation" means going to Syracuse for the weekend

10. One of your neighbors constantly has bonfires

Fan Fest!

I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.

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"10. One of your neighbors constantly has bonfires"

Was this written by your neighbor? :P


eppyomega.png

 

"That fairy needs to stop shouting in my ear, or I'm going to throw her friend I have trapped in the bottle into a lava pit or something. HEY, LISTEN! No, YOU listen. If something's important, just say so without yelling at me. Or fly over to it and change color like you usually do. Just because I'm busy mowing the lawn and hoping I'll find some spare change, doesn't mean I can't hear you." - Link

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