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I bought socks this weekend.

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Once every two years I buy a couple packages of socks. And every time I get a new package of socks I wonder to myself, why the hell do they come in resealable bags? There is even a graphic on the package saying "Resealable bag!" Does this mean my socks have a shelf life? Should I be concerned that my sock might expire if I don't reseal that bag after taking a pair out? And why are they so excited about the sock package being resealable that they had to add and exclamation point to the graphic phrase.. like its a long awaited feature sock purchasers have been waiting for for years.

Or should I be more concerned that someone could have worn these socks, washed them, ironed them and repackaged them in the "resealable bag" and thus returned them to walmart whose employees just throw shit back on the shelves. And lady looks at me odd when I sniff my socks out of the brand new package. I can only hope my socks aren't tainted, but for $3 a package I have no guarantees.

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